these words just come out with no gripe to bear

People asked me last week why Tiger Woods had to apologize to the world for his infidelities (well, they weren’t asking me so much as they asked the question within earshot, which is all the license I need). They advanced theories about Tiger being a role model, but that didn’t quite ring true. Tiger has [...]

he drinks a whiskey drink, he drinks a vodka drink

Like most single Americans between the age of 21 and 36, I regularly go out and drink with large groups of people. Wait staff at bars accommodate large groups by ringing an entire table up as a single check. However, in an informal gathering, people come and go at different times. They order different amounts [...]

to the logical limit

A little under a week ago, I took some flack from folks on LiveJournal for my assertion that sitcoms were an inferior form of art to more active, plot-driven stories. Well, that wasn’t really what I was asserting. What I asserted was that I didn’t like it when sitcoms did that, and that it was [...]

hit the shore ’cause I’m faded; honeys in the street saying money, yo we made it

Pascal’s Wager is an argument for belief in the Christian God – not proof of its existence, but merely a contention to believe in it – that runs as follows: [E]ven though the existence of God cannot be determined through reason, a person should “wager” as though God exists, because so living has potentially everything [...]

you want stylin’, you know it’s time again

A coworker came by my desk waving a sheet of paper. “We’re doing betting squares for the game this weekend. You want in?” “No thanks,” I said. “Come on. Only five bucks!” “Thanks anyway; I’ve got better things to spend my five bucks on.” “Like what?” “I don’t know … lunch? Movie tickets? Beer?” “You [...]

when the law break in, how’re you gonna go?

September 25, 2008: Lawmakers reach nearly reach deal on $700,000,000,000 bailout* By the time that bright, cold day in April rolled around, I’d been dealing for the monthly Mount Weather Blackjack Game for half a year. I’d been introduced to Mount Weather – the secret FEMA facility in which most of the Bush administration had [...]

professor? what’s another word for pirate treasure?

Before taking the current job, I had one interview and a follow-up with Extensive Enterprises (they took over the old Bear Stearns offices downtown). I had almost reached the elevator after the second interview when the COO caught up with me in a hurry. “I actually wanted to talk with you a bit more before [...]

cash rules everything around me

So I was sitting on the roof of the Temple, cooling my heels and drinking an Ecto Cooler Hi-C, when the devil appeared behind me. “Hey Satan,” I said. “Hey Professor,” he said, sitting down next to me. He kicked his feet over the side. “I guess you’ve heard that shit’s pretty bad, what with [...]

what you gonna do (do) after dark?

Did I ever tell you about my time as an economic advisor to the Bush administration? It was a while ago, before I met most of you, and I don’t like to bring it up too often. I met the C-in-C in a five minute meet-and-greet at his ranch in Crawford. This was early August [...]