then froze, only to blow the herb smoke through my nose

I hadn’t gone to 90s Night in a while, and my friend Meghan O’ also expressed a desire to go dancing. So after sharing some excellent Upper Crust pizza with Melissa and Fraley over the BSG finale, we trucked to Allston and shook it all out. The dance floor seemed more crowded but less sketchy than usual.

# # #

I bought an Afrin Pure Sea nasal rinsing … thing … about a week ago and started using it this weekend after some congestion. I can’t figure the damn thing out.

Both the bottle and the box ask me to refer to the insert for instructions, but the instructions aren’t so complicated that they couldn’t print them elsewhere. (1) Tilt your head all the way to one side. (2) Jam bottle into nose. (3) Let stream flow into upper nostril and out lower nostril.

I can manage step 1 just fine, but I may be failing on step 2. What inevitably happens is a stream of diluted seawater flows back out the nostril it went in, trickling down the side of my face and into my sideburns and ear. I wait there over the sink until my dignity returns, then cap the bottle, wipe my face and neck off and blow my nose vigorously. The result is marginally clearer breathing.

Possible issues:

  • Maybe I’m too congested in the nostril I’m trying. What if I stick the bottle up the clearer nostril first, and let the stream clear out the blockage with the aid of gravity?
  • Maybe I shouldn’t be holding my breath. Is that how the nose works? If I hold my breath, am I sealing up the necessary sinus cavities?
  • Maybe my head’s not tilted far enough to one side.
  • Maybe this is a scam.

Any advice, Internet?

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